With the country more divided than at any time in recent memory, many fear the death of the United States as we know it. There’s still some optimism out there, but for those who worry the end is nigh, Maynard James Keenan is here to tell you … you’re absolutely right.
“If you study history at all, the US is long overdue for a fall,” the Tool frontman told The Guardian (via Loudwire). “So you know, just keeping that in mind … I’m not being a doomsayer, it’s just that changes occur, it’s what happens.”
Like many Americans, Keenan sees the country’s current changes summarized by the rise and election of President Donald Trump. “We should have elected [Andy Kaufman],” Keenan said. “Fuck, I think we just did. I’m waiting for him to pull the mask off and say ‘Haha, I’m just kidding.’ That’s the problem with Andy Kaufman though. He won’t pull the mask off. He’ll fucking run us into the ground before he reveals it’s actually him, so we’re kinda fucked no matter what.”
(Read: Five Surprising Things We Learned from Maynard James Keenan’s Authorized Biography)
Keenan warns that “nobody’s coming to your rescue,” but notes that hope is not all lost. To outlast the coming downfall, he says people must learn to get by on their own and help their neighbors do the same. “If you want to survive this storm, [you need to] understand what a storm is,” he continued. “You need to understand how to survive it. It’s simple. Grow your own fucking food. Don’t rely on someone else to make it for you. Don’t rely on somebody else to build your house for you, don’t rely on someone else to bring water to you.”
If the sky really is falling, at least we can rely on Tool to continue working on their new album. Guitarist Adam Jones recently posted an Instagram photo from the studio, where the band had just finished a new song. Jones noted that vocals were still missing, but Keenan is likely occupied prepping A Perfect Circle’s first tour in six years. Looks like Keenan’s going to have a busy apocalypse.
