When Kid Rock first announced his “Bad Reputation Tour,” I jokingly referred to it as the “Superspreader Tour,” which sent the Bawitdaba stans into a tizzy, because god forbid one questions Mr. Colostomy Bag’s attention to health and safety. Well, lo and behold, Robert Ritchie is now threatening to cancel concerts on his upcoming tour if venues dare to enforce vaccine mandates.

In a video posted to Facebook, Kid Rock assured fans that he and his team did extensive research and are confident that they hadn’t booked a gig at a venue with an existing mandate; and if they had, that the mandates “will be done… by the time we’re going to get to your city.”

“If they’re not,” Kid Rock continued, “you don’t have to worry, you’ll be getting your money back — because I won’t be showing up either! If you think I’m going to sit out there and sing, ‘Don’t Tell Me How to Live’ and ‘We the People,’ while people are holding up their fucking vaccine cards and wearing masks — that shit ain’t happening.”


Kid Rock did not say whether he’d play shows at venues where a negative COVID test is required. However, as Rolling Stone points out, several of arenas he’s scheduled to play — including PNC Bank Arts Center in Holmdel, New Jersey, and the Xfinity Center in Mansfield, Massachusetts — do currently have such policies in place.

Earlier this week, Kid Rock released his latest masterpiece, “We the People.” My colleague, Wren Graves, described it as a “jingoistic circle-jerk [that] gives rightwing talking points a vigorous rubdown,” with lyrics mocking masks and the Black Lives Matter movement, not to mention the rhyming of “too” with “too.”